Friday, October 12, 2012

ON A ROLL: The Golfer

I suspect that this tale -- sent in by Bernie -- is based on a true story.

Stan Waller was at the country club for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie on the second.

On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole-in-one when his cell phone rang... It was a doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in a accident and was in critical condition and in ICU.

The man told the doctor to inform his wife where he was and that he'd be there as soon as possible. As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shaping up to be his best ever round of golf. He decided to get in a couple of more holes before heading to the hospital. He ended up playing all eighteen, finishing his round shooting a personal best 61, shattering the club record by five strokes and beating his previous best game by more than 10. He was jubilant....

Then he remembered his wife. Feeling guilty he dashed to the hospital. He saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about his wife's condition.

The doctor glared at him and shouted, "You went ahead and finished your round of golf didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself!"

"While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself at the country club your wife has been languishing in the ICU! It's just as well you went ahead and finished that round because it will be more than likely your last! For the rest of her life she will require round the clock care and you will be her care-giver! She will need IV's; you will have to change her colostomy bag every 3 hours; she will have to be spoon fed three times a day and don't forget the hygiene care!"

The man broke down and sobbed.

The doctor chuckled and said, "I'm just messing with you. She's dead.

What'd you shoot?"

Hey, hey, hey: don't blame the messenger!



4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow Doug. Tsk!

When's the next BlogCon so I can smack you upside the head again?

Reliapundit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Reliapundit said...

Barack Obama was at the military base for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie on the second.

On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole-in-one when his cell phone rang... It was Joe Biden notifying him that his wife Michelle had just been in a accident and was in critical condition and in ICU.

Obama told the vice president he'd be there as soon as possible.

As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shaping up to be his best ever round of golf. He decided to get in a couple of more holes before heading to the hospital. He ended up playing all eighteen, finishing his round shooting a personal best 61, shattering the club record by five strokes and beating his previous best game by more than 10. He was jubilant....

Then he remembered Michelle. Feeling guilty he dashed to the hospital. He saw the Biden in the corridor and asked about his wife's condition.

Biden glared at him and shouted, "You went ahead and finished your round of golf didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself!"

"While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself at the country club your wife has been languishing in the ICU! Diplomats have been murdered, allies have fallen to be replaced by extremists who hate America, and Iran got a nuke! It's just as well you went ahead and finished that round because it will be more than likely your last! For the rest of her life Michelle will require round the clock care and you will be her care-giver! She will need IV's; you will have to change her colostomy bag every 3 hours; she will have to be spoon fed three times a day and don't forget the hygiene care! And Sweden will probably demand you return the Nobel Peace price."

Obama broke down and sobbed.

Biden chuckled and said, "I'm just messing with you. She's dead.

What'd you shoot?"

directorblue said...

@nicedeb -

Please don't hurt me again.

My jaw is still a little dislocated.